How to Get Over an Infatuation When You Are Married?

How to Get Over an Infatuation When You Are Married? Reasons being infatuated while marriage and tips to getting over an infatuation.

Everyone desires to be wanted, cared for, and given full attention by their spouse. It is challenging for most married couples to fulfill the different emotional needs of their spouses, which is one of the reasons that lead to adultery.

The ability to get all the emotional needs from somewhere else causes the person to even draw nearer to that person and forget about their marriage. But, keep in mind that this is not true but an infatuation.

READ: When Do You Realize That It’s Love and Not Infatuation Anymore?

What is an infatuation?

An infatuation is when a person gets smote or carried away by great passion and desire towards another person. This happens between two people who have developed strong and consistent romantic feelings towards each other. Some people tend to confuse infatuation with love, but the two emotions are different.

What is the difference between infatuation and love?

Infatuation is a strong passion short-lived and revolves around intimacy, while love is an intense desire beyond intimacy. Love is the feeling between two people known each other for a long. But, infatuation occurs between two people who have known each other for a short period. In other words, love takes time to build and develop, whereas crush happens in a short time.

Here are Four Proven Tips on How to get over an infatuation when you are married.

It is not worth losing a marriage built for years over a short-lived relationship. If you are in such a situation, find ways to get over it for the sake of your marriage.

Here are a few tips on how to get over an infatuation when you are married:

1. Look at the other side of this person.:

When infatuated by a person, we tend to focus on the positive side only and forget that this person is also not all innocent. This is because we don’t want whatever is happening currently to end. But, keep in mind that this is just a form an attraction. So, list down all the negative features you see on the partner and compare them to your married spouse. For example, this person may have told you they are unwilling to marry you but want to have fun and take care of your sexual needs. On the other hand, your spouse vowed to be with you for better and worse, which means they are ready and willing to spend a lifetime with you. In this case, saving your marriage is more important.

2. Refocus your thoughts:

What is that thing that draws you close to that person? Is it loneliness or anxiety? Analyze all the factors that make you go looking for the person and find solutions to them. For example, you could find a hobby to keep you distracted or find a course to enroll in. Keeping yourself busy will limit your idleness and help you forget about your crush quickly.

3. Talk to them.:

Although keeping yourself busy helps to get rid of the connection between you and your crush, this does not guarantee that you will forget about them instantly. In fact, to some people, the more they stay away, the more they develop strong feelings towards that person. So, to assure your decision of cutting off the ties, try to hang out with them as much as often. Just ensure you hang out in public places and do normal activities as friends do. You will be surprised at how fast you will begin to get bored by this person since you are keen on observing your behavior.

4. Seek help:

Never be ashamed to seek any form of help to save your marriage. In this case, it is advisable to seek professional advice from a counselor. A counselor will listen to you, offer their opinion and guidance on how to approach the matter. Still, a counselor can give you tips on how to get over infatuation when you are married. So, talk to a certified marriage council around your town.

Is it right to have a crush while married?

It is usual for a wife or a husband to have a crush on someone other than your partner. Crushing on someone does not mean that your relationship is facing problems or you are a terrible spouse. It is common for couples to have crushes on other people other than their spouses because of being together as a couple for an extended period.

The important thing that you are supposed to do when crushing on someone is to know how to handle the crush. You should acknowledge it and carry on with your life.

How does the affair start?

An affair often starts before the affair partners come across each other. The matter usually starts manifesting in the husband’s or wife’s thoughts immediately hollowness and desperateness sets in the marriage. This is where the susceptible spouse starts having ideas that will never transform their marriage.

A person should note that an affair can occur at any time or anywhere. The location you are in is not the cause of starting an affair; the vulnerability state is where your heart is, how hollow you are feeling, or being unhappy in your relationship or marriage. Therefore, affair emanates within ourselves.

Can a married woman be attracted to another man?

Loving someone in your life does not mean you stop perceiving other people. It also does not mean that it is a leeway for you to fall into temptation. We are all human in nature, and finding your soulmate does not mean that you stop associating with the rest of the world. It is not just lifelike. Being attracted to one another is natural, and it is what activates our species.

Therefore, it is upon the married woman to learn how to handle the attraction so that she might not fall into the temptation of having an affair with another man.

How can you find out if your marriage is over?

If you are trying to fix your relationship, but it seems like it is too much of rigidity, then the following are unmistakable signs that it is time to do away with the relationship.

  • When every circumstance, no matter how insignificant it seems, leads to a fight
  • When you or your spouse constantly talk about insensitive events in the past
  • When there is no respect for each other in the relationship, and you cannot regenerate it
  • If your partner is not encouraging your growth
  • If you and your spouse can no longer share moral, ethical, or lifestyle values
  • When you both lost the art of concession, you can no longer come to an agreement whenever there is a misunderstanding.
  • When both of you lose that feeling of attraction towards each other, that is being sexually incompatible.

Is flirting cheating?

While flirting may precisely not be deceitful, it could be seen as a breach of faithfulness because you display concern in someone else. That very thought of looking outside of marriage and taking action, even slightly, can be perceived by your spouse as disrespectful. It might also lead you to a path that you may never recover if it advances beyond flirting.

A couple needs to set limits on what is and what is not tolerable in their relationship.

Some couples will find flirting invasive and lead to deceit, while others might find it enhances pleasure in their relationship.

What matters is the issue to be discussed responsively by both of you and come into concession.

How do I know if my husband was cheating?

Below are several elusive signs that you should consider should you be dubious that your spouse is disloyal.

  • Tend to be distant, display absence of interest or develops undescribed coldness.
  • When your spouse is always tired or shows no interest in the relationship
  • When he comes home repeatedly smelling different cologne from what he is used to
  • When on his arrival at home, he rushes to take a bath
  • If he stops putting on his wedding ring with no valid explanation

Is it acceptable to fall in love after marriage?

Morals, personal integrity, and ethics are the aspects that every human being has to have. When it comes to relationships, a human being has to choose intelligence over emotions.

If you experience issues in marriage, it is prudent to find a solution. Discuss the matter with your spouse and if it requires a marriage counselor, then do so and resolve the issue.

When a person gets married, they have vowed and promised to stand with their spouse through thick and thin. Therefore, they should respect marriage.

How do I know my husband is attracted to another woman?

Marriage is not always a bed of roses. There are times that couples have their differences through their relationship. There might be moments that you may feel that something has completely gone wrong.

Perhaps he has suddenly started arriving home late, and he used to come early; if questioned, he becomes defensive.

Lately, he is not close to you anymore. That distance exists between both of you. He does everything to avoid you by blaming it on too much work.

He suddenly starts to compare you with other women, and the behavioral change in him becomes noticeable.

Why does my husband flirt beside me?

Some men don’t see the harm in tossing a slight flirtation to another woman because they are confident that is not cheating. If he does it in front of you, it is perhaps ignorant that this disaffirms your status to him, and he is only thinking of his desires at that instant.

Flirting in front of you might also be a symptom of dissatisfaction with some aspect of your relationship.

What do you call a woman who engages in a relationship with a married man?

Any woman who has an affair with a married man knowingly or unknowingly automatically becomes his mistress. It doesn’t matter if his wife is aware or not.

Normally, the relationship is constant and at least semi-permanent, but the duo does not live together willingly, and the relationship is habitually, but not always undisclosed.

A mistress is very different from a prostitute because the mistress often exchanges demonstrative and social relationships between her and the man.

READ: 12 Signs of Infatuation: Can Infatuation Result to Real Love?


Marriage is a lifetime commitment, and it is not worth losing over some passion or attraction. So, if you find yourself fascinated by a person while still married, use these guides to help you get over it to save your marriage.

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